I Use to Hate You with All My Love

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fall girl

I Use to Hate You with All My Love ©

I use to hate you with all my love.

 

My life was broken, my spirit was crushed.

The day you decided he was worth more than us.

 

I use to hate you with all my love.

I use to cry at the thought of you without me.

I use to hurt with every memory of what I went through.

 

You were a toxin that burned my soul.

The marks you left there will never grow old.

 

I use to hate you with all my love.

I use to die a little each day remembering you and me that way.

I use to crawl through the boundaries of my skin, hating you more then I hated him.

 

You were the light that made my dark night bright.

The sound of your voice would release all my fright.

 

I use to hate you with all my love.

I use to crave your arms around me, telling me you’ll never leave.

I use to dream of a time, that you were here and your heart was mine.

 

The day he hurt me, I will never retrieve.

The light from my soul that he took I will forever grieve.

 

I use to hate you with all my love.

I use to hate him for taking me and you.

I use to run from my mind and every thought of you.

 

At my door angst awaits, on the steps it takes it’s shape.

I will not turn it away, I will let it in and I not be afraid.

 

I use to hate you with all my love.

I use to…

 

Now I love you with all and no hate.

Forgiveness is a beautiful thing.

 

I use to hate you with all my love.

-END-

© A. C. A. (aka Aletheia Dasein)

*The picture in post does not belong to me, I don’t know the original artist or I would give credit. It’s lovely.

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Can you hear her?

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Can you hear her?

Do her eyes tell you?

She has pain that she can’t control…

She has a power that is submerged.

 

Do you feel it?

Does that beat fill your ears?

The drumming is strong, but it won’t last long…

Birds flock to the warmth. 

 

Only to find walls.

Bells begin to chime.

Ringing, rising, throbbing…

Can you hear me?

 

Please let me be.

Take me with you on your wings.

Sail to the sea…

There is no measurement of time.

 

Up, the veil is strong.

The heat now gone.

Pulling at those words, echoing and falling into the spaces.

Lost to nothing, blending with the sound.

-END-

© A. C. A. (aka Aletheia Dasein)

Ramblings of my moment now

Well I hope all is going good for you. I have been going on a bi-polarish wave here lately. So much good and then so many frustrations. I don’t have anyone to talk about most of it with. I know I talk to you about a lot of stuff, but I leave a lot out. It’s prob better that way for now. But if I seem distant that is why. I don’t want to complain when I have so much. So I don’t, for the most part. I hint about things and then I move on. I study Taoism and other philosophy and meditations and I tell everyone about them, but sometimes it is harder than it seems to keep my mind empty and be focused. I am writing right now as a therapeutic recourse I suppose. I get to go to the to meet up with a couple friends tomorrow…I will try to take that and relax, however I won’t be alone. So that begs the question if I will truley relax and reflect…because there is always a social mask that we put on when we see people. Who we are with dictates which mask we wear. Some are thicker, more ornate than others. I think the most important mask to discard is the one we wear when we face ourselves. That it the one we should work on first right? We need to see ourselves before we can be seen by anyone else. Are we ever really seen by others? I have my thoughts on that. But, our ego which are highly influenced by the society in which we live in are the masks we wear… If I could practice non-judgement more and apply that to myself that would be good. To find others that practice (because no one is perfect we must all practice and keep practicing forever) non-judgement it would be nice right? Hmmm

I decided not to edit this or make it
pretty…it’s just what is on my mind.

© A. C. A. (aka Aletheia Dasein)

Soul Carries (The Poem)

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Soul Carries

Peel me open like a can and feel my raw beating heart in your hands.

Feel the rhythm and the heat, as the blood drips down,

into the earth it slowly seeps.

The sun shines down & cries with the wind,

I am brought full circle my life does not end.

The beating of my heart is no longer felt in your hands,

my soul carries on and flows with the rhythm of all and the land.

© A. C. A. (aka Aletheia Dasein)

The first post

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As my title reveals, this is my first post. In fact this is my first blog post ever. Well there may have been a point in time many moons ago that I attempted to make a blog. It would have been a failed attempt and most likely it wasn’t even worth the mention.  So, here I am, attempting to write a blog. This post is not really much of anything but a way for me to dip my toe in and test the waters.  I sat and thought about what profound thing I would say in my first post ever, really I did.  I thought about what cool picture I could share with it, to bring out what ever essence the post was brimming with. Instead I went with what a lot of writers go with…”this is my first post”. Nothing profound and exciting for you, the reader. For me it is a step though and I am happy to have made it! I may never write anything profound or even have an “audience”, but I will know I have gotten out of my shell and started to put my thoughts out there and if someone else likes them and wants to read more…well you’re in luck. I have a whole lot of nothing and something to say and not say. Welcome to my world.

© A. C. A. (aka Aletheia Dasein)